Olimar's Experiences on Guard Duty
by LilacFoxGirl1
Summary: Master Hand assigns Olimar to guard the front doors of the mansion every morning for the week. Naturally, it's not a hard job. It's actually rather interesting as Olimar hears strange and random stories every morning from the entering Smashers.
1. First Day, First Story

_**Author's Notes: **_**Hey, everybody, LilacFoxGirl1, here…Well, for now I don'thave much to say. But I hope you enjoy the first chapter of my story.**

Olimar's Experience of Front-Door-Guard Duty 

Chapter 1:

"Olimar," boomed Master Hand's voice from the intercom, "You are on front-door guard duty."

Olimar nodded. "Yes sir!" he replied with a salute. Then Olimar and his Pikmin ran out of the cafeteria and Master Hand resumed giving out chores.

Olimar stood right outside the front door of the great Smash Mansion, home of the Smashers of Super Smash Bros.

"My duty is to guard the outside so that no imposters come in," Olimar told his Pikmin. He took out binoculars and used them to scan the area. "You guys are going to help me keep watch, okay?"

Olimar's loyal Pikmin nodded.

After a few minutes, Olimar's eye caught a suspicious looking silhouette coming up the grassy hill. Adjusting his binoculars, Olimar watched as the silhouette formed into one of the Smashers. The Smasher called Ike.

Finally Ike walked up to Olimar, looking battered and bruised with rather shabby hair as if he had been in one bad fight.

Olimar took down his binoculars. "Ooh…What happened to you?" he questioned, looking up at Ike.

"Marth and I were battling and…" Ike began. He sighed and shrugged. "…He kicked my butt. Rough day."

Olimar nodded. "Ah. Well go right into the mansion. Dr. Mario will be happy to help with injuries."

Ike nodded.

Olimar watched him go before returning to stare out at the horizon. Much to his surprise, he saw Marth coming up the hill with an angry expression.

Soon Marth approached Olimar.

"Uh, hey, Marth," Olimar greeted him. Noticing Marth's messed-up hair, Olimar knew what had upset the prince. "What hap—"

"Some jerk messed up my hair in the middle of the night and stole my hair supplies," Marth growled. "This is the worst day ever," he said, walking into the mansion.

"Uh…Okay…bye." Olimar gave a feeble wave. Marth can actually be rather scary when he's angry. Olimar turned back to his work.

What idiot would mess with Marth's hair supplies?

_Maybe it was Ike,_ Olimar guessed. He realized another figure was coming towards him and his Pikmin.

Without warning, a pink blur smashed into Olimar and the two crashed into the wall.

"Ow!"

"Hey!"

The figure stood up, revealing to be Sonic the Hedgehog. Except…

"You're pink," Olimar said bluntly, looking deadpan. He got to his knees and pushed himself up.

Sonic groaned, facepalming. "I know. I'm surprised you didn't laugh," he added bitterly.

Despite Sonic being pink, Olimar had respect for all the Smashers and generally wasn't one to be rude unless necessary.

"What happened?" Olimar questioned as his Pikmin gathered around.

"Some Smasher snuck into my room and tried to spray-paint me pink. I was dodging the spraying until he shoved me out the window," Sonic began to tell.

"Out the window?!" Olimar repeated. "How did you recover?"

Sonic continued. "I was fine because I grabbed into the balcony and got up from there. I ran into the room, which was Marth's, so that the weirdo wouldn't get me."

Olimar raised an eyebrow.

Sonic put his hands up defensively. "I know what you're thinking, but I wasn't going to mess with Marth. Honest! That guy tried to get me again, and when I dodged again, I accidently fell onto Marth."

"And messed up his hair?" Olimar asked, putting two-and-two together.

"Probably," Sonic replied. "I haven't seen Marth, but if you do, please don't tell him. I want to live another day," Sonic joked.

Olimar chuckled. "I won't. But you might want to wash off that paint."

Sonic nodded. "Yeah, I will." With that, he sped into the mansion.

Olimar stared for a moment. That hedgehog sure could run fast.

"Hey, Olimar."

Olimar shouted in surprise, whipping around to see Snake. "Whoa, Snake. Don't scare me like that!" Olimar scolded. He glanced around and looked back up at Snake. "Where did you come from, anyway?"

Snake pointed to the sky, causing Olimar to look up and see the Cypher flying away. "…Oh," Olimar spoke, blinking.

"So you're doing the front-door guarding all this week, huh," said Snake, causing Olimar to look back at him.

"Yep," Olimar replied. He squinted and scanned the soldier. "Snake…Nobody has seen you all day, despite it being around 12 o'clock or later, but I think we've noticed you've been kind of…sneaking around," Olimar told Snake.

Snake sighed. "Yeah…Don't tell anyone, but I pranked Sonic by—"

"Spray-painting him pink?" finished Olimar.

"Yeah!" Snake blinked in surprise. "How did you know?"

"Um…Let's just say I took a hint," Olimar answered, shrugging with a small smile.

"Well…Okay then," said Snake. He took one last glance at Olimar before walking into the mansion.

Just then, the timer Olimar's red Pikmin was holding beeped.

The red Pikmin tugged on Olimar's pants and held up the timer. Olimar took the timer.

"Oh. My shift's over," Olimar realized. He smiled at his Pikmin. "Let's go inside and get lunch."

The group of Pikmin marched inside following Olimar.

_That was sure a weird story,_ Olimar thought as he walked into the main room. _Ike was bruised up by Marth because Marth was angry at someone who had taken his hair supplies and ruined his hair. And we Smashers know for a fact that Marth naturally wakes up with mostly-good-looking hair._

Olimar shook his head and continued to walk.

_Even though Marth isn't aware of it, Sonic jumped onto him because Snake, unbeknownst to Sonic, was chasing him trying to spray-paint him pink. Sonic didn't know it was Snake because it was dark._

"That's kind of weird," Olimar muttered aloud, walking up the stairs with his Pikmin.

_But there's still one thing I don't get._

Olimar pondered as he turned a corner, entering the hallway.

_What happened to Marth's hair supplies?_

Suddenly growling from nearby startled Olimar causing him to halt and immediately turn to a door part-way open.

Alarmed, Olimar swung open the door just to see Pit, in his cluttered and scratch-filled room, holding a pillow and a shoe with a large, brown bear on top of his bed.

Pit and the bear froze upon Olimar's entrance.

Pit blinked.

Olimar blinked and attempted to rub his eyes despite his helmet. He gazed at the strange scene.

"…Please don't tell Master Hand," Pit spoke after a moment.

_**Author's Ending Notes:**_ **How did you like it? Now, I got several questions you ask you guys (I'll try to ask questions at the end of chapters if nobody minds).**

**On a scale from 1 to 10, how weird do you think the situation was with Marth, Ike, Sonic, and Snake?**

**Who do you think stole Marth's hair supplies?**

**How do you think Pit got that random bear into his room?**

**If you didn't know, this story is going to be about Olimar's experience with Front-Door-Guard Duty. (Also, I made that job up.). The plot is Olimar on duty every morning, piecing together strange stories. The Subplot is Marth's missing hair supplies, pretty much. That's all for now. Please Read & Review!  
LilacFoxGirl1**


	2. Laundry Errors Attract Stalkers

_**Disclaimer: I do not own the Super Smash Bros or its characters, or Sonic the Hedgehog (from SEGA), or Snake (from Konami)!  
**_

_**Author's Notes: This chapter is longer than the last one, as you can see. With a little more detail and probably a half more…Well, either craziness or randomness…or weirdness.  
Oh! And replies to the epic six reviews I got! :D**_

_**To Bud89: The tip of the ice berg it is (being only the first chapter). I hope you like Chapter 2!**_

_**To hidingunderblankets: Same here. It's fun to see what's going on in the Smasher's lives when their world isn't going to be destroyed (usually). Yeah, the title is long. -.-'  
But that's just me, being oddly specific. I changed it to Guard Duty (if the change shows up at the time)! :D  
Chapter 1 may still say "Front Door Guard Duty", but at least the title is shorter.**_

_**To**____**Team Sonic Forever 4910**__**: Thanks! I'm glad Olimar's one of your favorite characters! The little guy is pretty awesome. (And in Super Smash Bros Brawl, my younger brother is such a pesky opponent as Olimar XD) You're welcome. I appreciate your review!**_

_**To Mikeylove241: …Insta yay! :D**_

_**To warriorcatgirl375: I could've called you Warrior Kitty, but oh well. Yeah, you can expect randomness from this story. Especially at the end. To be honest, I want to know! XD (I tend to write fun/randomness in my stories, and have to figure out how it happens along the way)**_

_**To KoopalingFan: Randomness is my middle name!...Okay, not really. But when it comes to humor, randomness is abound! True, it could be Roy…But /is/ it? (I don't even know…yet. XD) Yeah, the Melee Rejects are in this story. Olimar just might encounter them one of these chapters. Buying a bear on eBay? No—Well…Actually…Maybe. This is /Pit/ we're talking about.**_

_**Thanks to all you guys who reviewed! I hope you all like the next chapter! :)**_

Olimar's Experience on Front-Door-Guard Duty

Chapter 2

The next morning, Olimar made his way down the stairs and entered the first floor of the Smash Mansion. He then walked outside with his Pikmin following.

Outside, Olimar took out a timer, set it for his shift, and gave it to his one of his red Pikmin.

Olimar inhaled the fresh morning air. "Ah, another day at work," he spoke.

It was quite a fine day. The sun was shining, birds were chirping (except for Falco), the grass was green, and Jigglypuff was running towards Olimar screaming like crazy from afar.

…

Wait, what?

Olimar whipped out his binoculars and placed them up to his eyes. "Jigglypuff?"

Jigglypuff was running towards him, wide-eyed with apparent fear.

Olimar let down his binoculars and waited until Jigglypuff dived and finally slid face-first in front of him.

He looked down at her, perplexed. "Um…Jigglypuff?" Olimar spoke in a questioning tone.

Jigglypuff instantly hopped up. "Olimar!" she shrieked. Jigglypuff grabbed him and began to shake Olimar rapidly.

"Olimar!" Jigglypuff shouted again. "There's-this-really-creepy-person-named-Boja-Ko-Nuqa-and-he-says-he's-stalking-me-and-that-he-knows-where-I-live-and-he's-going-to-come-and—"

Olimar pushed Jigglypuff off of him and took a cautious step back. "Jigglypuff, what are you talking about?" he asked with a puzzled look.

Jigglypuff looked as if she was going to explode with fear.

"Some crazy guy is stalking me and he's going to find me!" she screamed at the top of her lungs.

After Jigglypuff's intense shout, all became quiet. Even the people within the Smash Mansion heard. A few opened their windows to check the problem outside.

Olimar glanced around. He looked back at Jigglypuff, slowly blinking. "…And?" he prompted, raising his shoulders and raising an eyebrow.

Jigglypuff grabbed Olimar's shoulders. "Do you not see what's going on here?" she demanded worriedly and began to shake him. "He's going to come to the entrance to _destroy you_, too!" Jigglypuff shouted.

Seeing that Olimar was frozen, Jigglypuff let go and moved back just to stare at him.

It Olimar fifteen seconds to slowly process Jigglypuff's words. Then he realized what she meant.

Olimar's hands smacked against the sides of his helmet.

"AAAAH!" Olimar screamed in panic.

"AAAAH!" Jigglypuff screamed, also in panic.

They both jumped up with alarm. "AAAAAH!" they screamed in unison before Jigglypuff zoomed to hide around one side of the mansion. Olimar, still in the air, kicked his feet as fast as he can and zipped off around the opposite side, leaving behind an Olimar-shaped cloud. The cloud was blown away by the wind.

His Pikmin glanced at each other and then scurried after Olimar.

A moment later, Olimar peeked out from behind the corner. His eyes surveyed the area.

Seeing that it was clear, Olimar slowly and carefully brought up his left leg and ever so carefully tapped it onto the grass out in the open.

He waited a brief moment before doing the same with his right leg, thus in a limbo-like pose.

Seeing that he was still not dead, with more confidence he won't die, Olimar stood up straight and walked normally, turned, and motioned for his Pikmin to follow him.

The Pikmin easily walked out and gathered next to Olimar without a problem.

Olimar looked out at the horizon and wiped the imaginary sweat from his helmet. "Whew. Glad that's over," Olimar remarked. He then walked back to his post along with his Pikmin.

Olimar then began to whistle the main Super Smash Bros Brawl theme as the time passed.

He looked out at the forest not too far from the mansion. The inside was dark, but he could tell it was filled with many trees. Olimar also knew that in the middle of the forest was a lake. That lake was rumored to have Rayquaza in it, but of course it was just a rumor.

"Olimar!" called the familiar voice of a Smasher.

Olimar turned to see Pit glide down and land in front of him.

Olimar noticed, oddly enough, the irises of Pit's eyes were red. Olimar was quizzical, now. Was this an imposter?

"Pit?" Olimar spoke in the same questioning tone he had with Jigglypuff.

"Hi, Olimar," Pit replied. Besides the red eyes, Olimar also tilted his head, hearing that Pit wasn't in his usual happy attitude.

Noticing Olimar's puzzled look, Pit raised an eyebrow. "What? Oh," he said in realization. "It's the eyes, isn't it?" Pit asked, pointing to his red eyes.

Olimar nodded in response.

Pit shrugged. "Yeah…I did something evil today."

"It…didn't have anything to do with destroying a village, did it?" Olimar inquired. The morning radio news had said somebody had lit a village far off on fire, and Olimar hoped his angel friend had nothing to do with that. Pit was an angel, for goodness sake! How could he be evil? Especially as evil as burn down a village-That was just downright evil!

"What?!" Pit exclaimed, interrupting Olimar's thoughts. "No way!"

"Oh thank goodness," Olimar sighed in relief.

"I may have done something not nice, but I'm not _that_ evil," Pit informed him, putting his hands on his thighs.

"Okay, okay, sorry," Olimar apologized. "…But what _did_ you do?" he asked.

Pit laughed a bit as he remembered. "You know how we have SmashChat accounts?" Pit asked Olimar.

Olimar nodded. "Yep. I've seen some of the weird conversations, but I haven't used my account for communicating, yet."

"Yeah. Well, I got bored on SmashChat this morning since nobody was on except for me," Pit began, "And then this random person on SmashChat told me that I should try scaring someone, so I asked how I could do that, because I was bored."

"Who was this 'random person'?" Olimar asked, feeling a bit skeptical.

Pit shrugged. "Pretty much a random person, because I don't know who," he replied. "Anyway," Pit continued, "the person told me that I should make another random account and pretend it belonged to a creepy stalker person, and then I could pretend to be them and scare the life out of whoever I message," he finished explaining.

Olimar thought for a moment, tapping his foot. "…So, you're telling me, you got an account, influenced by a random person who you do not know, pretended to be a stalker, and scared the life out of Jigglypuff?" Olimar concluded.

"Yea—Wait, how did you know I sent a message to Jigglypuff?" Pit asked, suddenly finding Olimar suspicious.

Olimar pointed to the side of the mansion Jigglypuff had disappeared around. "Jigglypuff ran to me screaming and told me," he informed.

Pit nodded slowly. "Ooohhh…"

"But," Olimar spoke, "I'm still confused."

"About what?" Pit questioned him.

Olimar tilted his head. "Why are your eyes red?" Olimar questioned, puzzled. He looked just as confused as he sounded.

Pit raised his index finger. "Oh! Here, let me tell you the story," Pit suggested, sounding a bit peppier.

"Once upon a time, there was me," Pit narrated.

_Pit stood in a white area._

"I was happy."

_Pit smiled._

"But bored."

_Pit lowered his eyelids and sighed._

"So, I walked into Zelda's room."

_Suddenly a door appeared in the white area. Pit opened it and skipped inside. Inside was Zelda, holding a book and using her magic as she read._

"Zelda was practicing her magic. And then it hit me-"

"What?" asked Olimar, interrupting the story.

Pit blinked. "…Zelda's magic."

"Oh. Sorry. Continue," said Olimar with a nod.

Pit nodded and continued.

"Anyway, she was practicing her magic."

_Pit watched in awe as sparkles from Zelda's magic flew into the air. Zelda stared at the book intently._

"And then Zelda's magic hit me."

_The sparkles turned into blue lightning and struck Pit, charring him black and causing Zelda to drop her book in surprise._

"Oh, I'm so sorry Pit," Pit spoke in a high-pitch voice, attempting to sound like Zelda. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," Pit replied in his normal voice.

"Pit," Pit said in his Zelda voice, "I think I need to run some tests to see what the magic did to you."

"Okay. That sounds cool!" Pit exclaimed in his regular voice.

Olimar stared at the puppet show Pit had set up during the story.

"Actually," Pit spoke in his Zelda voice, moving the Zelda hand puppet, "It could possibly be painful."

"Nah," Pit replied normally, moving his Pit hand puppet. "It couldn't be that bad."

Pit then came up on the invisible screen of the puppet stage, now as the narrator. "And then, it was _that bad._ The end!" he cheered, holding up the Zelda and Pit puppets.

Olimar gave Pit a strange look as the angel walked out from behind the puppet stage. "…Okay..?" Olimar spoke slowly.

"That made sense, right?" Pit asked Olimar.

Olimar nodded. "Yeah…If your story basically is that you walked into Zelda's room, were struck with magic, and now you have red eyes," he spoke, gazing at Pit.

Pit shook his head. "No, no, no."

Olimar stared at Pit quizzically. "Hm?"

"You see," Pit said, "I went to Zelda's room, was struck by magic, and went through _painful tests_, and _then _we _found out_ I get red eyes when I do something not nice!" he finished, matter-of-factly.

Olimar blinked. "…Okay," Olimar said, nodding slowly, "I think I got that."

"Awesome," Pit replied with a smile. He began to run into to mansion.

"Now I'm going to go find Snake and do everything that this list says!" Pit called, holding up a list labeled "Top Ten Ways to Freak out Your Roommate" for Olimar to see. Pit then disappeared into the mansion.

Olimar stared the way Pit had gone. "…Poor Snake," he sighed, shaking his head. Olimar turned back around. His eyes widened and he glanced around, seeing that the puppet stage was nowhere to be found.

A moment later, Olimar saw Wolf walking towards him wrapped in a navy-blue blanket. This had Olimar both puzzled and curious.

"Um…Wolf?" Olimar spoke up, causing Wolf to stop in front of him. "What-?" Olimar began.

"It's the blanket, isn't it?" Wolf interrupted bluntly.

"Um…Yeah," Olimar admitted. "It is morning; it's not that cold outside and…"

"I know," Wolf interrupted once more. Knowing Olimar wasn't one to be rude, Wolf just literally dropped the blanket all together.

Olimar said nothing. "Um…Wolf. Your clothes are…"

"Pink, I know," Wolf finished, looking away.

"How is that even possible?" Olimar asked, pointing to some of the non-fabric parts of Wolf's attire. Everything Wolf was wearing, even the non-fabric, were some shade of pink.

"I don't know!" Wolf exclaimed, throwing his hands up. "Some moron mixed up the laundry," he grunted.

"So, I'll assume you did something about it?" Olimar guessed.

"Sort of," Wolf muttered, picking up his blanket. "I decided to indirectly take my anger out on a random person. So I hacked into some random person's account and told Pit to go scare somebody," he explained, cloaking himself in the blanket.

"Well…That makes sense," Olimar responded, remembering his encounter with both Pit and Jigglypuff.

"Do you know who Pit sent the stalker message to?" Wolf questioned, raising an eyebrow.

Olimar nodded. "Yep. The first person I saw today was Jigglypuff, and she was freaking out over some stalker," Olimar informed.

There was a moment of silence.

"…Wow, I thought you would laugh," Olimar spoke up again, breaking the silence.

"I would, but right now I'm not in a good mood," Wolf answered. He then walked into the mansion, saying, "I'll laugh when I see Jigglypuff, though."

Once Wolf was gone, Olimar rolled his eyes and returned to his work.

A yellow Pikmin tugged on Olimar's pant leg, causing him to look down. The yellow Pikmin pointed, causing Olimar to look up again and see Popo walking towards him.

"Olimar," Popo began as he reached the entrance of the Smash Mansion. "Have you seen Nana?"

"No, why?" Olimar asked.

"We were playing Hide-and-Seek with the other kids, and Ness said that Nana and I should split up. We usually don't split up because Nana isn't good at finding her way around places," Popo explained. "But then Ness somehow got us to separate, so now I don't know where she is," he finished.

Popo added with a pout, "And I had to do the laundry in the middle of the game!"

"You had to do laundry?" Olimar questioned.

Popo shrugged. "Sort of," he admitted. "I was supposed to separate the clothes with Yoshi, but then Yoshi had to go because Kirby was stealing food from the fridge and he had to stop him. So I had no idea how to separate the clothes," Popo explained.

Before Olimar could speak, Popo spoke again. "But I think I got everything right," Popo stated, looking proud at himself.

"Um…Maybe," Olimar said slowly, remembering Wolf's now pink attire.

Then something wearing pink caught both Olimar and Popo's eye.

"Hey, Popo! I'm over here!" called a certain Ice Climber by the name and voice of Nana.

Olimar and Popo turned to see Nana behind a tree, waving at Popo.

"Nana!" Popo exclaimed, running over to her.

"Popo!" Nana cheered. Once Popo got to the tree, the two Ice Climbers high-fived.

"Listening to Ness was the stupidest idea ever," Nana declared.

Popo raised an eyebrow and thought for a second. "Actually…Listening to Toon Link would be the stupidest idea ever," Popo spoke.

Nana looked up and thought for a moment. She looked back at Popo. "Yeah, I guess you're right. Now let's go hide!"

The Ice Climbers then ran out of Olimar's sight.

"…Well…I guess that was kind of interesting," Olimar spoke. His Pikmin nodded in agreement. Olimar and his Pikmin then heard the sound of some girl singing.

They looked up to see Princess Peach skipping merrily towards them.

"Hello, Princess Peach," Olimar greeted with a bow, causing Peach to giggle. "How was your day so far?" he asked.

"Quite fine, though I didn't do much," Peach answered. "I did do the laundry, though."

"Oh?" was Olimar's curious response.

"Yes, but I didn't separate nor check for the clothes to be in the right piles," Peach stated.

"How come?" Olimar asked.

"Every time I've checked before, everything is in order," Peach explained. "So this time I felt no need to check. I'm going to get lunch. Bye!" and with that, Peach waved to Olimar and skipped into the mansion.

". . ."

Olimar blinked.

Then the timer his red Pikmin was holding went off. The Pikmin scurried up to Olimar and held up the timer.

"Oh, looks like once again my shift is over," Olimar announced, picking up the timer. He then put the timer back in his pocket. "Now, like Peach said, let's get lunch."

Olimar and his Pikmin walked into the mansion and entered the main living room.

_Yet another weird day,_ thought Olimaras he walked.

_Jigglypuff afraid of a stalker who was actually Pit with another account, who was influenced by Wolf because Wolf was angry._

Olimar walked up the stairs with his Pikmin lined up behind him.

_Wolf decided to indirectly take his rage out on somebody because Popo, though Wolf doesn't know, didn't know how to separate clothes, which I find kind of strange._

Olimar turned the corner at the top of the stairs and walked down the hall.

_Yoshi, apparently knowing more than Popo, left to stop Kirby from stealing food, so Popo mixed up the clothes. Princess Peach should've checked to see if the clothes were in the right piles, but she didn't because before they were always correct._

Olimar stopped in the middle of the hall to think.

…_Wait, if she puts the clothes in the washing machine, then wouldn't she see which clothes were which?_

After a moment, Olimar shook his head and turned to the door of his room.

_Oh well._

He turned the knob and opened the door.

Like yesterday, Olimar froze in place with wide-eyes upon seeing Marth, standing in front of Ike, in a hot pink, sparkly tutu and Ike wearing an Easter Bunny outfit, sitting on his bed.

Both swordsmen stared back at Olimar.

… Awkward silence

"Ike," Marth said slowly, not taking his eyes off of Olimar. "I think we're in the wrong room…"

Olimar slammed the door shut, whipped around, and slid back against the door, breathing heavily.

He looked down at his Pikmin. "I think this is going to turn into a regular routine," Olimar breathed, letting out a sigh.

_**Author's Notes: **_**Yes, I think it'll be a regular routine, too. XD  
Now for the questions:**

**If you got a creepy stalker message like Jigglypuff did, how would you react?**

**When Pit came in with red eyes, did you think he was an imposter?**

**If you saw Wolf in an all-pink outfit, would you laugh at him?**

**Do you think Popo really tried to do the laundry, or that he just throw clothes in piles randomly?**

**Did it make sense that Peach didn't know the clothes were mixed or not?**

**What do you think Ike and Marth were doing in Olimar's bedroom?**

**Random Fun Fact: Remember how Pit's fake stalker's username was "Boja-Ko-Nuqa"? I looked up those three words and apparently in Bosnian "boja" means "color" and "ko" means "ko" means "who" and nuqa has no meaning that I know of. And "boja ko" means skin color. Congratulations, you learned something! XD  
:) LilacFoxGirl1**


	3. No Trouble, Just Weirdness

_**Author's Notes: Instead of replying to each review individually, I'm just going to say to all of you: Thank you all for reviewing. I'm really happy you guys like it so far. :D  
I just really hope the quality doesn't drop. Maybe it will, but I don't want it to get really bad. But I'm sure that'll never happen, since this story is pretty random. You can never run out of ideas *points to a rainbow fountain of ideas*  
…And people think I'm the smart/sane one in real life. XD  
Maybe, but not always in stories.**_

_**So, unlike the last two chapters, surprisingly this might take a few chapters. I honestly don't know how I got this weird idea to reference to a story I haven't posted, but luckily it's a story I'm glad I didn't post. It's just one of those stories that are random with OOC-ness (because it was a dream…)**_

_**So, here's the next chapter. Sorry if it's not as good as the last!**_

Olimar's Experience on Guard Duty

Chapter 3

_**((((((The Next Morning))))))**_

Olimar looked up at the clock on Samus's bedroom wall.

Samus, leaning against the wall, glanced at Olimar and then at the clock. She looked back at Olimar. "Is it time for you to go on guard duty again?"

Olimar nodded. "Yep!" he replied, hopping off the spare bed. "Say, Samus, why do you have an extra bed, anyway?" Olimar asked.

Samus shrugged. "I don't know. People were too lazy to move it out. Why did you want to stay in my room last night?" Samus questioned as Olimar found his Pikmin.

"Ike and Marth were doing something really weird in my bedroom," Olimar answered, now searching for his timer.

Samus watched as a blue Pikmin scurried past her. "So? Just kick 'em out."

"First I need to buy or borrow some Lysol, just in case," Olimar told Samus. He turned around to see his white Pikmin holding up the timer. Olimar took the timer and put it in his pocket.

Samus rolled her eyes. She sighed and shook her head. "Peach probably has Lysol."

Olimar snapped his fingers. "Good thinking, Samus. When I'm done with my shift, I'll ask Peach about it," he planned aloud.

When Olimar found he was all set to go, he smiled.

"Thanks for letting me have refuge in your room," Olimar thanked as he walked out the door with his Pikmin tagging along.

"No problem," Samus replied. She turned and notice half a cardboard box in her part-way open closet. "HEY!"

_**((((((The Entrance of the Smash Mansion))))))**_

Just as he stepped outside, Olimar set his timer and gave it to the same red Pikmin as last time.

The Pikmin took the timer and hopped back into the group of Pikmin.

As he kept watch, Olimar wondered, _What weird things will I hear or see today?_

His answer came when he suddenly heard the screaming of a certain swordsmen with the Ragnell.

Olimar took out his binoculars to see Ike running—or rather stumbling very quickly with progress—towards him. Besides that, Ike was yelling something incomprehensible to Olimar.

"OLIMAAAAR!" Ike yelled as he finally reached Olimar.

Olimar stepped back as Ike fell onto the ground.

"Ike?" Olimar spoke in a questioning tone, staring down at Ike.

Ike grunted and stood up again. "Olimar!" he exclaimed. Ike got down on one knee and continued. "Olimar, you have to run. Those crazy versions of the Smashers from my crazy dream are _real_ and they are coming _here_!"

Olimar blinked twice, not knowing what Ike meant. "Excuse me, but…What are you talking about?" Olimar questioned.

Ike jumped up and waved his arms up and down frantically. "I'm talking about those weirdo versions of us like a crazy Sonic who broke up with a chilidog, Samus who is really creepy and in love with me, and Yoshi who is a total jerk and think he owns everything and you who keeps on dying from lack of oxygen and those are only _some of them_!" Ike shouted, hopping up and down. "We've got to get out of here!"

Olimar scratched his helmet in an attempt to scratch his head. "Ike," Olimar spoke with a puzzled expression, "I don't really follow—"

"We need help!" Ike cried out. He raised his hands to the sky dramatically. "WE'RE IN TROUBLE!"

Suddenly, Ike and Olimar's eyes both widened and they froze, hearing a strange tune with some chorus men singing.

_When in trou-ble, who-do-you call?  
SNAKE! Snake, Snake, SNAAAAAAAAKE!  
When in trou-ble, who-do-you call?  
SNAAAAKE! YEAH!_

Ike clamped his hands on his head. "Oh no," he said, glancing one direction. "Oh no."

Ike glanced another direction. "Oh no!" he shouted, finally whipping around to face Olimar, who was very confused now.

"Who were those weird people singing?" Olimar asked. He looked up and then to the side. "In fact, _where_ are those weird people who are singing?" Olimar asked, raising an eyebrow at Ike.

"Olimar, we're in danger…well, not so much," Ike admitted and continued. "But weirdo-help-dude Snake is coming!"

" 'Weirdo-help-dude'?" Olimar repeated. Since when was Snake labeled a "weirdo-help-dude"?

Ike bent down next to Olimar and pointed to the far off sky. "That theme song is weirdo-help-dude Snake's theme song. That means he's coming to help us when we're in trouble, which we're in trouble because he's coming to help us!" Ike exclaimed, jumping up again.

Olimar looked up at Ike. "Um, Ike, I don't want to be rude, but I don't really think…"

Ike folded his arms, rolling his eyes. "Oh, _I see_. You guys all think I'm crazy because there are _actually_ weird versions of us that only _I_ have seen."

"No, that's…" Olimar thought for a moment. "…Actually, yeah, I think that's it."

Ike shrugged. "Okay. Then let's just stand here and wait for weirdo-help-dude Snake to come and _then_ you'll see what I'm talking about," Ike stated with a huff.

Olimar gazed at the grass-covered ground. "…I…guess so…if he comes."

Ike nodded slowly. "Oh, he'll come. He'll come…" Ike assured, his eyes darting back and forth

Olimar stood up upon hearing a strange noise on the grass.

It sounded like the grass was being…lightly scraped?

Ike looked left, Olimar looked right.

The sound repeated itself causing Ike to look up and Olimar to look left.

The soft scraping got closer and closer causing both Ike and Olimar to look at each other.

They both looked down to see a familiar cardboard box at their feet.

"Told you," Ike spoke. He then looked up above.

Noticing this, Olimar pointed down at the box. "But, Ike, the box is right here."

"Yep," Ike answered.

Suddenly Olimar's eyes widened as Snake instantly fell from above, crushing the poor cardboard box.

"…But he's not," Ike finished as Snake kicked the box away.

Olimar and his Pikmin shrank back at Snake's strange behavior.

"Ike. Olimar." Snake quickly turned to Ike and then Olimar. "Ike," he said turning to Ike again. "I heard you need help."

Olimar blinked and stared at Snake. "…Excuse me?"

Snake turned to Olimar. "I heard you need help," Snake repeated. He turned to Ike. "I know how to help."

"Help with what?" Olimar asked confused about both Snake's behavior and what they needed help with.

Snake blinked. "…You have a problem. I'm here to help you with your problem."

"But _what_ problem?" Olimar demanded. "I don't know what you're talking about!"

After a moment of silence, Snake turned to Olimar and then Ike.

"What's your problem?" Snake asked.

Olimar looked up at Ike. Ike looked back at Snake.

Olimar began. "Um—"

"What's your problem?" Snake asked.

"I—"

"I'm here to help you with your problem," said Snake.

"But I—" Olimar was cut off.

"You have a problem, and I'm here to help you…with your problem," Snake said again.

Olimar tried once more to speak. "I don't—"

"What's your problem?" Snake asked.

Ike sighed. "Weird-help-dude Snake—"

"Just jump into the Pool of Lemonade to help your problem!" Snake interrupted.

Olimar and Ike paused, blinking.

"…"

"…"

Snake blinked. "…Ike, Olimar, I'm here to help you with your problem. What's your problem? I'm here to help you with your—"

"_What_ are you _talking about_?!" Olimar demanded. He's had enough of Snake's crazy repeating and weirdness.

"…problem," Snake finished. "Just jump into the Pool of Lemonade to help your problem."

Before Olimar could say any more, Snake turned to an invisible audience. "I helped their problem! I'm outta' here!"

And with that, Snake took out the Cypher and flew away.

Olimar gazed at the direction where Snake had flown off to in bewilderment. Ike stared, his arms still folded, as he apparently expected that encounter from the beginning.

After a moment, Ike turned to Olimar. "Told you so."

"…Is there anybody worse than him?" Olimar asked, still staring at the sky.

"Yep," Ike answered.

"Then…we're doomed," Olimar stated and then glanced at Ike. "Who's worse than Snake?"

"There's…" Ike shivered. "…that creepy Samus…"

Olimar raised in eyebrow. "Creepy?" he repeated. Olimar had to admit, Samus could be scary because of her rage at times, but "creepy"? That didn't seem like the right word for someone like Samus.

Ike nodded vigorously. "Yes, creepy!" he exclaimed. "On a scale from one to ten, she's a hundred!"

At this, Olimar knew Ike was very likely exaggerating. Even if Snake acted weird, Samus couldn't act _that_ creepy. Besides, it's not like Snake was taking over the world or setting landmines everywhere, right?

Olimar shook his head and turned to Ike. "So…now what?"

Ike shrugged. "I don't know."

Then a Pikmin tugged on Olimar, causing Olimar to look down. "Hm?"

The Pikmin pointed to the horizon, where the figure of Kirby was running towards them.

"Oh, hey, look! It's Kirby," Ike stated, pointing out the obvious.

Kirby happily ran up to them and stopped. He waved. "Haaiii!"

Then a second Kirby ran up and stood beside the first Kirby. He glanced at the first Kirby. "Does this guy speak English?" asked the second Kirby, pointing to the first Kirby.

"…"

Ike and Olimar exchanged glances.

"…Hi Kirby that can speak English," Ike greeted the second Kirby.

Olimar gazed down at his Pikmin. "I suddenly have a feeling that this will be a long day…"

_**((((((To Be Continued))))))**_

_**Author's Notes**_: **I'm going to take a guess and say you guys are a little freaked out? Besides that, Olimar! It's only been two chapters (three, counting this one) and you just broke your routine! Or…I broke your routine…**

**As for weird-help-dude Snake, I don't think he's that bad. But he is pretty weird. Kind of like if you walk up to a character in a game and press A over and over or do the right thing they'll keep repeating what they say.**

**As for where that weird Snake came from: Once upon a time there was me (who didn't have an account at the time). I had just read a few random fanfictions and was also inspired by a fanfiction about one of the Smashers in a dream. So, thus, I randomly chose Ike and made a story called "Ike's Crazy Dream". Thus, those weird versions of the Smashers were born.**

**About "creepy" Samus…She's not like "creepypasta" creepy. She's just…so weird. I actually hope you guys don't want me to add her. Normal Samus? Sure, but that weird Samus? Hahahahahaha- NO. (maybe…) Every time I read over the part I put her in, I just have this urge to skip it because it's weird. And don't expect me to actually do couples in my stories, because generally I do not (I'm more of a humor-person, plus, I have never been in a relationship). It's not that I don't like things like Samus X Ike, but what Ike said about that "creepy" Samus…**

**Okay, I'm talking too much. QUESTIONS:**

**One a scale from one to ten, how weird do you think "weird-help-dude" Snake was?**

**One a scale from one to ten, how humorous do you think he was?**

**If Marth and Ike were in your room the day before (like Olimar's experience), would you stay out of your room for awhile?**

**When the cardboard box first appeared, did you think Snake was inside of it?**

**There. Now let's just hope that 1) I do not put the "creepy" Samus in this story and 2) that you guys like this and it keeps getting better.**


	4. The Adventure for the Stolen Idea Begins

_**Author's Notes: **_**Sorry for not updating yesterday.  
…or the day before… But I have reasons! ...That you guys probably don't want to hear. Anyway, I thank all of you guys who reviewed! :D The reviews made me laugh at some points, especially when the questions are answered. I really appreciate you all! :D**

**From the answers about "weird-help-dude" Snake, apparently he was a real weirdo. XD  
Instead of introducing another "Crazy-Dream Character", an adventure begins! But don't worry (or…do worry if you don't want to meet them?), because the Crazy Dream Characters will be shown soon either in the next chapter or the chapter afterwards. :D  
**

**And to answer Destiny Willowleaf's question, I guess I'll sort of take ideas, but right now for the adventure I have my own.**

**If you do have a suggestion for a chapter, you should (but you don't have to) PM me. The reason why is if it's in the reviews, people will know what to expect. XD**

Olimar's Experiences on Guard Duty

Chapter 4

_**((Recap: Last time on "Olimar's Experiences on Guard Duty":  
Olimar plans to get Lysol after his shift.  
During his shift, Ike informs Olimar that weird versions of the Smashers are coming! Olimar doesn't believe this, until a large majority of the chapter is taken up by Snake, who Ike dubs "weird-help-dude" Snake!  
Then two Kirby (Kirbies?) appear! What will our heroes do now?))**_

"What do we do about this?" Olimar asked Ike.

Ike squinted his eyes, and stroked his chin thoughtfully. "Hmmm…" A light bulb suddenly appeared above his head. "I got it!"

Fox walked outside. Noticing the light bulb, he walked over and unscrewed it from the air. "Thanks Ike," Fox said, walking back into the mansion. The door then shut behind him.

Olimar, Ike, Kirby 1, and Kirby 2 gazed at those front doors that Fox walked through along with Ike's idea light bulb.

"…Oh no!" Ike finally exclaimed. He pointed at the doors dramatically. "He stole my idea!" Ike and the two Kirby (Kirbies?) hurried towards the doors.

"Actually, it's a light bulb," Olimar corrected as the trio ran past him. He and his Pikmin watched as Ike grabbed the knob of one of the doors.

Ike pressed his shoes against the doors to push off and pulled the knob as hard as he could in an attempt to open the doors. Ike shook and pulled the doorknob, pushing off the doors as hard as he could. He struggled, pulling with all his might!

Then the door slowly, slowly creaked open about half way.

"...To the inside!" Ike declared, jumping off of the door and running inside followed by Kirby 1, 2, Olimar, and Olimar's Pikmin.

"You know, Ike, that was kind of unnecessary," Olimar informed Ike as they ran up to stairs.

"I know," Ike replied, "but I thought it would make me look a lot more awesome."

Kirby 2 ran up beside them. "Actually, I think it would've been awesome if you punched the door down."

"Says you," Ike uttered as they turned the corner at the top of the stairs.

The group continued running down the hall and passed Mario, almost running him over. Olimar looked back to see Mario waving his fist at them.

"Hey!" Mario shouted, looking angry. "No running in the halls!"

"YOU'RE TOO SLOW!" taunted a voice as a blue blur flashed by.

Mario growled. "Why you…"

Sonic sped up and ran beside Ike. "Hey, dude. What are you running for?" he asked.

"We're trying to get back my idea!" Ike shouted.

Sonic gave him a confused look. "Uh, what?"

"Fox stole Ike's idea," Kirby 2 stated, hopping up beside Sonic.

"How…does that even work?" Sonic asked, still rather confused.

Still running, Olimar answered, "Ike apparently had an idea, so a light bulb appeared above his head. Then Fox came outside and took the light bulb."

"Then he walked back inside with my idea!" Ike yelled. His eyes narrowed. "And we won't let him get away with this."

Ike turned to Sonic. "Do you wanna' join us?"

Sonic shrugged. "Sure, but you should stop or follow me," he added, instantly running into a random entrance to his left.

"Huh?"

Olimar and Ike looked forward to see—

CRASH!

-a wall. They had run into the end of the hall.

Ike and Olimar smashed into the wall, causing many cracks to appear around them. Kirby 2 would've run into Ike, but instead he conveniently bounced off and landed in front of Kirby 1.

Olimar pushed his face off of the wall and shook his head vigorously. "Well, that was unexpected."

He then fell onto the floor.

Kirby 2 walked over to Olimar and stared down at him. "…Are you okay?"

Olimar sighed, sitting up. "Yes. I don't know about Ike though," he informed, pointing to Ike, who still appeared to be as flat as a pancake against the wall.

"Ooh…" Kirby 2 closed one in eye with a sympathetic look. "That looked like it hurt—"

Ike instantly ripped off of the wall and landed easily on his feet. "To the room!" he declared, raising his hand and index finger. He then ran into the room Sonic had before.

Olimar and Kirby 2 blinked. "…I stand corrected," Kirby 2 spoke, glancing at Olimar.

"Ike is a tough guy," Olimar replied before getting to his feet.

"Maybe he can't even feel pain," Kirby 2 guessed as they walked into the room along with the Pikmin and Kirby 1.

Olimar stopped when they entered and looked around.

The floor was covered in carpet. There was a large, rectangular window with the beautiful outside framed in white. The walls were cream-colored. But nothing was in the room from what Olimar could see.

Olimar now had a puzzled look. He looked around. "Where is..?"

"Hey guys!" Ike exclaimed, poking his head out.

Olimar took a few steps to the side before realizing Ike was standing in the doorway of another room.

Sonic then poked his head out as well. "Oh, hey guys. Over here!" Sonic called, motioning for them to come. Then he and Ike disappeared into the room.

Olimar and Kirby 2 exchanged glances.

"Um, okay," Olimar answered, walking towards the next entrance. He paused, realizing that it was a dark hall that lead for who knows how long. "…Huh." Olimar looked around the dim hallway. "I didn't even know this existed."

Kirby 1 and Kirby 2 hopped up behind Olimar.

"Cool," Kirby 2 murmured in awe before stepping in.

"Poyo!" Kirby 1 cheered.

The group began to walk with Ike and Sonic in the lead.

With each step forward the hallway darkened.

Sonic looked around and whistled. "I wonder what this hallway leads to," Sonic wondered aloud.

"I hope it leads to either my idea or turkey bacon," Ike stated, staring ahead.

"I just hope it's not a trap," Olimar spoke, gazing cautiously. He watched a moment as the light from the entrance got small and smaller as they continued. What would they do if the light completely disappeared?

Olimar then looked back ahead and realized in front of him was pitch black. "Um…G-guys?"

"Come on, Olimar!" prompted Ike. Suddenly, a hand (presumably Ike's) grabbed onto Olimar and pulled him into the darkness.

"AH!"

"Don't worry, guys," they heard Sonic's voice.

"Poyo!" Kirby 1 exclaimed. Olimar could imagine the amused smile on Kirby's face despite their blind predicament.

"Um, where are we? Where are you guys?" Olimar asked, keeping his arms out in front of him and attempting to feel his way around. Currently he couldn't find anything in front of him.

Olimar suddenly landed face-first onto the ground.

"Ow!" exclaimed Kirby…1 or was it 2?

_I must have tripped on one of them, _Olimar thought.

Olimar put down his arms and got to his feet. He glanced around at the black once more before sticking his arms out in front of him.

"Keep going," came Ike's voice from somewhere around the hallway.

"But I don't know where I'm going," protested Olimar, walking off to find the wall. Finding the wall, he put his hands up against it and moved forward with the wall as a guide.

"Gee, you'd think that Master Hand would put lights in this place," Sonic remarked in the dark.

"Hey, since Master Hand has no eyes but can see, do you think he can see in the dark?" asked Kirby…2.

_The second Kirby _is_ able to speak English…but wait, why not our Kirby?_ Olimar wondered. _Jigglypuff spoke English. Maybe Master Hand's "air of translation" vanished like it does every once in awhile._

Olimar suddenly came to a halt upon realizing something. "Guys!" he called.

"Ah!" Kirby 1…or 2 exclaimed in surprise.

"Stop," Ike ordered, just in case the group got any farther.

"We're right here," Sonic assured. "What's wrong?"

"Where are the Pikmin?" Olimar questioned, beginning to worry.

There was a moment of silence.

"…They followed you in here, right?" Sonic asked.

Olimar nodded, despite Sonic unable to see. "Yes," Olimar answered, "But I don't know if they can follow me in this dark."

"Pssh," Ike scoffed. "That's ridiculous. I can see in this dark just fi—WHOA!"

Olimar then heard a rather loud "Thud!"

"Ike, are you okay?" Sonic asked.

"…Am I in heaven?" Ike asked. Olimar figured Ike was dazed, somehow.

"...Uh…No?" Sonic replied, sounding unsure of the question.

"Then I'm good," Ike declared. Olimar heard Ike get to his feet. "Now let's contin- Wait, is it just me or did the floor—AAAH!" Ike shouted, his voice suddenly started becoming distant.

"Ike? Ike!" Sonic called. "What happened?"

"ACK!"

Then they all heard a loud bang against metal far below them.

"…I am totally not okay!" Olimar heard Ike's voice faintly call.

"Where did he go?" Olimar asked.

"Did he fall?" questioned Kirby 2. "Is there a metal staircase?"

"No way. Ike would've fell again," stated Sonic.

"But—" began Kirby 2.

"And again," Sonic added.

"Oh—"

"And again," Sonic said again.

"Sure—"

"And again," Sonic repeated.

Kirby 2 started, "That's—"

"And again," Sonic added.

"Okay—"

"And again," Sonic continued.

At this point, Olimar figured Kirby 2 didn't even bother to try any more.

"And again," Sonic kept saying, "And again…and again…and probably again…and then again, again…once again, again…and again…and then again…and-"

"Sonic, I think we get it," Olimar interrupted. "Not to be rude," Olimar added quickly, "But I think we know what you mean."

Sonic stopped. "Oh. Okay."

"…Wait, what about Ike?" Olimar realized aloud.

"Oh, him…Uh, well, I don't know," Sonic answered. "…Now what?"

"Well, we can't see so we don't know what we're up against," Olimar stated.

"…Has anybody seen the other me?" Kirby 2 questioned, sounding confused.

The three paused to hear a descending sound effect plus a loud "Thud!" at the end.

"…I found him!" Ike called from the distance.

Despite the dark, Olimar blinked and looked around, still only seeing black. "…So…now what?"

Olimar then heard the sound of shoes on the floor. Probably Sonic, being he's the only one near who actually wears shoes (Ike wasn't very near).

"Let's go find them," Sonic suggested. Olimar and Kirby 2 heard him stop. "…Uh oh."

There was another descending sound effect followed by yet another loud "Thud!"

"…There is a large hole in the ground," Kirby 2 concluded.

"What can we do to get them out?" Olimar asked.

"We don't," Kirby 2 stated. "One…two…"

"Wait, what?!"

"THREE!"

Suddenly something jumped onto Olimar's back causing him to fall forward—into the hole.

"AAAH! WHAT'S GOING ON?!" Olimar shouted in panic, waving and kicking frantically in the air as he was falling—fast.

Olimar looked behind him to see Kirby 2 on his back.

Kirby 2 cheered. "WOOHOO!"

The two noticed the light that came up from down below getting larger every second.

"How do we land?!" Olimar demanded to Kirby 2.

"I don't know!" Kirby 2 responded.

Ike, Sonic, and Kirby 1 came into view.

"Oh, hi guys," Ike greeted while Sonic stared at them.

Sonic's eyes widened. "Oh cru—"

CRASH!

…Brief blackout..?

Kirby 2 groaned and sat up, rubbing his head. He hopped up, looking around. "…That…was…AWESOME!" Kirby 2 shouted before pulling Kirby 1 out from under Ike and hi-fiving him.

The two Kirby (Kirbies?) then jumped off of the pile.

After a few steps, they stopped and looked around.

Kirby 2 gazed at his surroundings. "…Ooohh…Where are we?" he asked. Kirby 1 shrugged.

Olimar groaned and crawled out from underneath both Ike and Sonic. He then noticed and two Kirby (_Kirbies?)_. Olimar walked up behind them. "Kirby, we are never doing that again."

Kirby 2 and 1 turned to Olimar. "Which Kirby?" Kirby 2 asked.

"You, being the only Kirby who speaks English," Olimar clarified. He looked up at their surroundings. "…Where are we?"

The area they had landed in looked to be made out of metal. There was also a metal door on the opposing wall, but other than that and themselves, the place was empty.

"I don't know," Kirby 2 replied.

Ike and Sonic joined them and there was but a moment of silence…

"…Let's go through that door," Sonic suggested, before zooming over to the only door in the area.

"Alright! Idea and/or turkey bacon, here I come!" Ike cheered, bounding ahead.

Kirby 1, 2, and Olimar followed. "Guys, do you really think this is a good idea?" Olimar asked.

"What else is there to do?" Sonic asked before swinging the door open.

"Yeah, Olimar," Ike prompted before walking in. "Where's your sense of adventure?"

Olimar sighed and walked in. "It was replaced by my sense of not wanting to get injured."

Ike laughed. "Oh, come _on_. Olimar, dude, this is the _Smash Mansion_!" Ike exclaimed, making gestures. He turned around to follow Sonic. "Nobody gets hurt in this place."

"Oh really," Olimar muttered as he, Kirby 1 and Kirby 2 followed.

"Actually, everybody gets hurt in this place," Kirby 2 piped up, hopping up next to Ike.

Ike glanced down. "Wha—Uh—Will you quit correcting me?!"

"He's only done that twice," Sonic spoke up. "And the first time didn't count." He stopped causing the group behind to him to stop as well.

"What is it?" Olimar asked, moving up beside Sonic.

Then they saw a room with doors all around the walls. The hall had ended, but only one door will lead to somewhere convenient. Which one?

_**Author's N—**_

Just then Ike, Sonic, Olimar, Kirby 1, and Kirby 2 perked up at hearing something beep.

Beep…beep…BEEP!

Olimar whipped around to see his Pikmin, lead by the red Pikmin holding his timer.

"My Pikmin!" Olimar shouted in joy. He dived down and hugged all his Pikmin.

"Awww, how heartwarming," Kirby 2 spoke up as the rest of the group watched.

"Poyo!" Kirby 1 cheered.

"…Well, your shift is over," Ike stated, deadpanned.

_**((((((To Be Continued))))))**_

_**Author's Notes: **_**Yay! Olimar reunited with his Pikmin! I'm happy how this chapter came out, since it includes 3 out of 5 senses: Sight (included in almost all stories), Hear (because of the dark hallway), and Feel (since Olimar had to feel a bit in that dark hallway). :D Now for the questions:**

**What do you think Fox needed that light bulb for?**

**If you were in Mario's place, what would you do?**

**Why do you think Olimar didn't know the first empty room (with the window) existed?**

**Do you think the dark hallway actually had lead to something or was supposed to lead to that hole being a trap?**

**What are three things you think the group will find in those doors?**


	5. Doors Filled with Randomness

_**Author's Notes: **_**'Tis I! LilacFoxGirl1…or Lilac.**

**Lilac is fine, too…**

**I have randomly appeared with another update to Olimar's Experiences on Guard Duty! :D *confetti***

**What may be considered bad news is school is tomorrow, so of course I'll be updating less. I will try to update, but they'll probably be spread out across the weeks. Most likely, they'll appear on Fridays, Sundays, or late afternoon on Saturdays, but I can't promise anything considering it hasn't happened yet. Once again, thank you all for reviewing and reading!**

Olimar's Experiences on Guard Duty

Chapter 5

_**((Recap: Last time on "Olimar's Experiences on Guard Duty":  
Ike comes up with an idea, but then Fox steals it!  
Thus he and the rest chase after Fox with Sonic the Hedgehog joining along the way!  
Then, they find a mysterious, dark hallway, end up in a room, and find another hallway, find more doors, and Olimar reunites with his Pikmin! What will our heroes do now?))**_

The group made up of Sonic, Ike, Olimar, Olimar's Pikmin, Kirby 1, and Kirby 2 looked around the round, metal room with metal doors all around.

"…Sooo," Ike began, "Which one is the right door?"

Sonic shrugged, eyeing one of the doors. "Who knows? All of these could lead to more traps."

Olimar gazed around, mentally counting the doors.

He turned to Ike and Sonic. "Guys, there are ten doors, and possibly only one out of ten tries will be right."

"Oh, whatever," Ike responded, rolling his eyes. He walked towards one of the nearest doors and took the handle.

"Ike, wait!" Olimar called, concerned. "You don't know what's in there!"

"It's fine," Ike assured. "It's not like there's a monster behind this door, right?" With that, Ike swung the door open revealing a Zero-Suited Samus.

"Ike!" Samus exclaimed, her eyes suddenly lighting up.

Ike jerked back. "AAAAH! A MONSTER!"

Instantly he slammed the door shut, took out a random key, and locked it. Ike whipped around and slid down to the floor, breathing heavily.

Olimar raised an eyebrow. "Um…Ike? What was that about? And where did you get that key?"

Ike took a deep breath. He looked up at the group staring at him. "Guys…that was…creepy Samus…"

"Huh?" Olimar was puzzled. Samus being there was random, sure. But that encounter wasn't really creepy.

Ike held up his index finger, still breathing heavily. "Look…I can tell, because Samus would not react like that towards me unless she's…_creepy_ Samus. Creepy Samus always randomly appears, because she's stalking me because she apparently loves me like Amy loves Sonic."

Sonic rolled his eyes, not looking very amused. "Nice comparison…"

Olimar glanced at Sonic and then at Ike before pausing.

Sonic's eyes widened as he raised a supposed eyebrow. "Um," the hedgehog seemed to state.

Ike gave them a strange look before turning to see Samus bent down beside him with a cheery smile.

"Ikey!"

"AAHASDFMOVIESCREEPYTOMATOSAUCE!" screamed Ike leaping into the air.

"Not even a locked door can separate our love!" Samus declared before lunging at Ike.

"AAH! LEAVE ME ALONE, MONSTER!" Ike shrieked, running away.

"Ikey, come back!" Samus pleaded, running after him.

Olimar watched as the two ran around and around.

"Huh."

Olimar turned to Sonic. "Wow, this does remind me of Amy and you," Olimar remarked.

Sonic nodded, watching Ike and Samus back on the scene. "Yep…and this is definitely not Samus."

"Definitely," Olimar agreed.

Olimar remembered something and pondered it for a moment. "Say…Why _did_ we run up the stairs, go into the room, and walk down the hallway?" he asked causing Sonic and the two Kirby (Kirbies..?) to look at him.

"Weren't we looking for Fox?" Sonic questioned Olimar.

"Yes," Olimar replied, "But how did Ike know Fox even went this way?"

It was a valid question, and everybody else knew, too. Apparently, Ike caused all of this to happen by leading the others somewhere random in search for Fox.

_But how did Fox disappear so fast?_ Olimar wondered. _Did he go into the kitchen beside the front doors of the mansion and Ike missed it?_

"Hey, let's try another door," suggested Kirby 2. He and Kirby walked over to a different door and opened it revealing a very strange scene playing out.

Curious, Olimar and Sonic walked over to see what was going on.

In the door, there were the Smashers all grouped up on a large hill covered in grass with a large hole and a giant slug that looked to be about the size of Ridley. But right now, it appeared the scene was focused on another Sonic and Wolf standing by a hole, large enough for someone to fall in.

"Sonic, I found free chocolate." The group watching heard a voice come up from the hole.

"Hey, that's Tails' voice," Sonic realized.

_**((((((The Scene Playing Out Within the Door…))))))**_

"I don't like chocolate," said Sonic.

"…Oh…will we ever be friends again?" Tails asked.

"Nope, because I'm a good friend. And good friends don't do that," replied Sonic.

"They might…Where's the Good Friends Rule Book?" asked Wolf, searching for the said book.

"Oh no! I lost it!" exclaimed Sonic with a scared tone.

"No, it's in here," replied Tails.

"…Oh…will you ever give me that book again?" Sonic asked.

"Nope, because I'm keeping it. And I'm keeping it for no reason," replied Tails.

"You might be…Where's the pizza that we ordered earlier?" asked Daisy (also in the hole with Tails), searching for the said pizza.

"Oh no! I lost it!" exclaimed Tails with a scared tone.

"No, it's up here," replied Sonic.

"...Oh…will you ever give me our pizza that we paid for with our money?" Tails asked.

"Nope, because I stole your money to buy the pizza without actually doing that so therefore it is mine," replied Sonic.

"That makes sense…Sonic, where's your other shoe?" asked Wolf.

Sonic gasped. "Oh no! My lucky shoe!" he exclaimed, seeing that both shoes are on his feet. "Alright, Tails, hand over my shoes!"

"No."

"…Oh…will you ever give me my lucky shoe back that I paid for with no money?" Sonic asked.

"Nope, because I stole your money to buy the shoe without actually doing that so therefore it is mine," replied Tails.

"Wait," interrupted Wolf, "I thought that Sonic said that he paid for the shoes with no money…"

"He did?" Tails questioned, puzzled.

"I did?" Sonic questioned, equally puzzled.

"You did? Wait…yeah, you did." Wolf responded.

"Oh." spoke Tails.

"Oh." spoke Sonic.

"Oh." spoke Wolf.

_**((((((Back to the Group Watching…))))))**_

There was a brief moment of silence before Sonic took the doorknob and slowly shut the door.

He turned to the others. "…Um…"

"Let's…try another door," Olimar suggested. _That was really weird…_

"Sure," Sonic agreed. He gazed around at the other possible doors. "Which one?"

"Any one!" piped up Kirby 2. Olimar and Sonic looked to see Kirby 2 and Kirby 1 swing open another door, revealing Falco tied up on a table like Ike had done to him last Thanksgiving.

This caused Kirby 2 to quickly close the door. "Not that one."

Sonic opened a door.

Within was a blonde-haired lad with a crown in pink, and two brown-haired girls in red and green.

Sonic then closed the door, turning around. "Definitely not this one."

"What are we even looking for?" Olimar questioned, walking up to a nearby door.

"A way out, I guess," Sonic responded, opening another door, revealing Spongebob Squarepants.

"Hiya, stranger!" Spongebob greeted with a wave.

Sonic quickly shut the door and zoomed off to open another one.

"Oh," Olimar responded. He opened his door, revealing a vast ocean below and a large ship being attacked by a gigantic octopus.

Olimar blinked and shut the door.

"What did you find?" Kirby 2 questioned, hopping across the room to another door.

"Um…Let's just say, that was definitely not the door we were looking for," Olimar replied before quickly stepping out of the way of Ike, who was still being chased around by Samus.

"AAH! GUYS, HELP ME!" Ike yelled, running around and around with Samus on his tail.

"Ike, stop fooling around," Sonic ordered, opening another door to see the back of a Buneary with a rocket launcher on its back.

The Buneary turned around. "What on ear-?"

Sonic closed the door.

Kirby 1 opened a door.

Everybody paused to hear the voice of an opera singer float through the room before Kirby 1 closed the door again with a blank expression.

Olimar opened another door, revealing Meta Knight holding an ignited bomb.

"…Hi Olimar," Meta Knight greeted.

Olimar shut the door and turned around. "How many doors did we open so far?" He questioned.

Sonic paused and then answered. "I opened about three doors. What about you?" he asked, turning to the two Kirby (Kirbies?).

"I think I opened only two," Kirby 2 recounted. He pointed to Kirby 1. "He opened that one with the opera music."

"And…I believe I opened two doors," Olimar spoke, adding the numbers up. "So…we opened eight doors?"

"Oh, and Ike opened one," Kirby 2 reminded.

"Oh, yeah," Sonic responded, nodding slowly. He turned to Olimar. "So what?"

"That means there's only one door left to check," Olimar declared.

Everyone (minus Ike and Samus) looked over at the one door that had not been opened yet.

Sonic looked back at Olimar. "So, you're saying that the last door will lead to some sort of exit?"

Olimar shrugged. "I hope so." _What else could it lead to?_

The group (minus Ike and Samus) gathered at the last door.

"Hey, Ike!" Kirby 2 called to the said mercenary. "We're going to open the last door!"

Ike slowed to a stop and looked at them. "Really?" he asked.

The group nodded.

"Oh, that's great," Ike replied.

"IKEY!" Samus exclaimed, tackling Ike to the ground.

"AAAH!"

"…"

Sonic, Olimar, and Kirby 2 turned back to the door. Kirby 1 watched as Ike was struggling to avoid "creepy" Samus's death hug.

"Um…Anyway," Olimar spoke. He put his hand on the doorknob and slowly, slowly, open—

"What the crud!" Kirby 2 exclaimed before Sonic could (both impatient), grabbing the doorknob and whipping the door open.

The group gazed inside, seeing a short hallway that splits into two different ways. Both appeared to be almost as dim as the last dark hallway they went through.

No leads, no evidence of which way to go. Both ways looked about the same, but nobody could tell for sure if they both ended up at the same place.

Ike finally shoved Samus off, scrambled to his feet and took off running in circles again, with Samus right behind him.

"…" Sonic's eyelids lowered as he stared ahead. "This is going to take some time…"

The group nodded in agreement as a scream from Ike behind them was heard.

_**Author's Notes: **_**That was fun to write. :D Also, I'll add to the disclaimer.  
**

**Disclaimer: I do NOT own Spongebob Squarepants along with any of these characters who belong to Nintendo, except for Sonic belongs to SEGA, and Spongebob Squarepants who belongs to Nickelodeon, I believe.**

**And, if you're wondering where on Earth that scene with Wolf, Sonic, Tails, and Daisy came from, it's from my longest/really weird/randomest story that I so far have ever written called "Brawl Up on a Hill". Currently, it's not posted (and I doubt it ever will be. xD)**

**Now for the questions!**

**At first, did you expect any of the doors to be a trap?**

**What do you think of that random scene that played out with Wolf, Sonic, Tails, and Daisy?**

**Did you expect any of those people/scenes to be behind those doors?**

**Which door was your favorite?**

**Can you guys spot any sort of reference to shows or ideas? ;D**

**See you all next chapter! :)**


	6. Going into the Suspicious Hallways

_**Author's Notes: **_**[WARNING: Short explanation/story ahead] …One day…**

"**Hmmm," Lilac wondered. "What do I do next with Olimar's Experiences on Guard Duty?"**

"**Oh, I know!" suggested a part of her mind we'll call "Mitzie". "Why don't you go on a long hiatus with your story?"**

"**Nahhh…"**

**/One long hiatus later…/**

"**Okay," Mitzie spoke. "Now you can go back to work on Olimar's Experiences on Guard Duty."**

"**Okay!" Lilac agreed. She then sat down at her desk. She brought up the document and stared at it…for a long time. "…I know! I'll write a short story and call it "A Smashtastic Children's Play!""**

**And thus…I didn't update this for over a week! *headdesk* *headdesk* The end… (But I'll do better! I shall!)**

Olimar's Experience on Guard Duty

Chapter 6

_**((Recap: Last time on "Olimar's Experiences on Guard Duty":  
Ike opens and door and gets chased around by "creepy" Samus for pretty much the rest of the chapter!  
Ignoring this, Kirby 2 opens another door where a weird scene that doesn't make sense plays out.  
Then, they split up to try and find the right door (minus Ike).  
Finally, they find the right door that leads two different ways! What will our heroes do now?))**_

Olimar raised an eyebrow, glancing at the left hallway and the right hallway. "There's no way to tell where either one leads to," he stated. "It's dark and they both look the same."

"What if they both lead to the same place?" Kirby 2 questioned, looking up at Olimar.

"Eventually, they'll have to but we don't know for sure," Sonic replied, with a glimpse at Kirby 2.

"AAAAAAAH!"

The group stopped and turned around to see Ike still being chased by Samus.

"GUYS, WHY ARE YOU NOT HELPING ME?!" Ike demanded as he kept running around…and around…and around.

Sonic put his hands on his thighs, tapping his foot. "Ike, it's not that big a deal. Tell her to buzz off."

"Oh, yeah? What makes you think she'll listen?!" Ike questioned. He and Samus continued to run around.

Olimar blinked. "Ike, if you don't stop or follow us, we'll have to leave you behind!"

"But I don't wanna' be left behind!"

"Then come with us!" Kirby 2 exclaimed.

"Maybe we should just leave him here," Sonic muttered as the group watched Ike.

Olimar shook his head. "But we can't. He was the one to brought us on this…random journey, and he apparently doesn't want to be left alone with Samus."

"_Creepy_ Samus!" Ike corrected.

"Ike! Don't hide your love from me!" Samus shouted, still chasing him.

Like before, the group watched them go around, around, and around.

"What are we going to do?" Kirby 2 questioned.

"Poyo," spoke Kirby 1.

"I don't know," Sonic responded, staring at Ike getting chased.

"Our options seem to be," Olimar began, "lock Samus up or take her with us."

"NO!" Ike objected.

Sonic looked down at Olimar. "Why take her with us?"

"Because if she's with Ike, and Ike's with us, she'll come with us," Olimar explained.

"Oh…how would we lock her up? I'm up for that," Sonic stated, loosening his shoulders.

"We throw her into one of the doors!" Kirby 2 suggested, jumping up beside Sonic and Olimar before falling below their height.

"A door that'll keep her occupied," Olimar added, looking back up at Sonic.

Sonic stretched. "Oh, that shouldn't be too hard. But Olimar…"

"Yeah?"

"I know your guard duty ended, but weren't you supposed to still be there when we left after Fox?" Sonic reasoned.

Olimar froze, realizing his mistake.

"...We bring up questions at the wrong times," he finally spoke.

"Oh well. Too early for logic!" Kirby 2 declared.

"Actually, I think you mean too _late_ for logic," Olimar corrected.

Kirby 2 waved it off. "Oh well."

"Guys," Ike reminded them. "HELP ME!"

Sonic blinked, focusing back on Ike's predicament. "Huh? Oh, right. I got your back, Ike!"

Sonic lunged at Samus.

_**((((((One Small Skirmish Later…))))))**_

Olimar, his Pikmin, Kirby 1, and Kirby 2 watched as Sonic tightened the rope around Samus (who was now practically a mummy of rope) and Ike duct taped her mouth shut.

Sonic then hopped off, and he and Ike threw Samus into one of the doors.

Ike slammed the door shut, took out the same random key from before, and locked the door.

He surveyed his work before taking out the duct tape. "Just to be safe…"

In short, Ike completely duct taped the door shut.

Observing, Olimar raised his eyebrow quizzically. "Was that really necessary?" he asked as Ike and Sonic walked over.

Ike nodded. "Yes. Yes it was. Now let's go to the-!"

"Wait," Sonic interrupted. The others looked at him.

"What?" Ike questioned.

"We still don't know which hallway to go through," Olimar pointed out for Sonic.

"Yeah," Sonic agreed. "So how do we decide?"

Ike thought for a moment. "Hmmm…" He stroked his chin thoughtfully. "Hmmmmmm…."

Sonic and Olimar exchanged strange glances.

"Hmmmmmmmm—I got it!" Ike exclaimed, a lit candle appearing above his head.

"Hey, where did that candle come from?" Olimar asked.

"It's my backup if I don't have a light bulb," Ike justified. He narrowed his eyes. "Especially since somebody whose name starts with an "F" and ends with an "ox" stole it..!"

Olimar tilted his head to the side. "Really..?"

Ike nodded. "Yes!"

"Anyway, what's your idea?" Sonic questioned.

"I'm glad you asked." Ike put his hands on his hips. "We…are going to split up!"

"Wait," Sonic interrupted once more. "Isn't that how the people in horror movies get taken one by one?"

"But we'll still be in a group," Olimar pointed out.

Sonic faced Olimar. "But you never know!"

"Unless your name is Ike."

The two gave Ike strange looks, but the mercenary was unfazed.

"If your Ike, you always know," Ike stated, looking proud.

Kirby 2 laughed loudly. "HAHAHAHAHA—Oh, wait, your serious..?" He stopped, raising a supposed eyebrow at Ike.

Ike raised an eyebrow back at Kirby 2. "Yeah, I'm serious. Problem?"

Sonic rolled his eyes with a sigh. "Come on, guys," Sonic spoke, walking in between the two. "Let's just split up into two groups."

"No matter what, I'm with my Pikmin," Olimar stated as his Pikmin gathered around him. His Pikmin nodded in agreement.

"I'll be with Olimar," Sonic decided. He sped over to Olimar's side.

"Then that means Poyo Kirby and I are with Ike," Kirby 2 figured. He and Kirby 1 walked over beside Ike.

"Alright," spoke Ike, turning to the two hallways. "My team will go left," he said, pointing to the right hallway. "Your team will go right." Ike pointed to the left hallway.

"Um, Ike," Olimar began. "That's right, and that's left," he corrected, pointing to the right then left hallways, respectively.

"Close enough," Ike replied with a shrug before marching into the right hallway.

Sonic and Olimar glanced at each other, both shrugging. Then Olimar's crew headed into the left hallway.

_**((((((With Olimar's Group…))))))**_

Sonic, Olimar, and the Pikmin walked down the dim hallway, looking around every now and then.

"…Again, what are we doing?" Sonic questioned as they continued to head straight forward.

"Honestly," Olimar admitted, "I don't know."

They kept walking.

_Of course, we _are_ looking for a way out,_ Olimar reminded himself. _But what if this leads to the opposite of 'out'? 'Deeper in'?_

He paused, gazing at the wall to his left before continuing. _I wonder what we'll find._

"Hello?" Kirby 2 spoke up.

His voice echoed throughout the cave.

Kirby 2 grinned. "Cool!"

As they walked, Sonic and Olimar looked about.

"There has to be some sort of lead here," Sonic mumbled, glancing at the wall.

"Perhaps it leads to some sort of exit," Olimar suggested.

Sonic looked ahead. "Maybe…Do you think we'll meet up with Ike again?"

"Probably so."

"I hope so," Kirby 2 stated. "I was supposed to go with him in the first place."

Sonic and Olimar both froze abruptly causing Kirby 2 to bump into Sonic's legs.

"Oof!" Kirby 2 stepped back, giving the two weird looks. "What?"

Olimar turned to Kirby 2. "You mean you followed us here, leaving the non-English-speaking Kirby and Ike alone?!"

"…"

Kirby 2's eyes lowered, looked slowly to the side, and then peered back up at Olimar. "…Yes?" he answered hesitantly.

Olimar stared, feeling shocked while he heard Sonic facepalm with a slap.

Kirby 2 stared back at them. "So? What's the worst that can happen?"

"Anything!" Olimar exclaimed. He began to pace with the Pikmin right behind him. "They could fall into another trap, meet a dead end, get ambushed, get lost, get hurt, get hurt during an ambush, set off a trap that may or may not reach us, and worst of all—"

"Not find turkey bacon?"

Olimar stopped and stared at Kirby 2. "…No." He resumed pacing. "They could get themselves into a dangerous situation and die!"

Olimar then noticed Sonic and Kirby 2's reactions didn't look as concerned about what he had said.

Blinking slowly, Sonic shook his head. "Okay, Kirby 2 should've stayed with Ike because he can be…ridiculous a lot of the time, but I doubt they'd die. _Highly_ doubt," Sonic corrected himself.

Olimar blinked at this response. "Well…" He stood straight. "It could still happen! You never know."

"Oh well!" piped up Kirby 2. He began to walk off cheerfully. "No stopping now!"

"H-hey!" Olimar called.

"Wait up!" exclaimed Sonic.

The two ran after him, Sonic catching up quickly while Olimar—not as much.

The trio walked deeper and deeper into the cave.

_**((((((Moments of Walking Later…))))))**_

Olimar glanced around. Everything was the same, even the dimness of the room. "Huh…I'm surprised that it's still the same lighting all the way through here."

"Heh, me too," Sonic agreed with a nod.

"Good thing, too," Kirby 2 spoke. "We won't get lost or fall in a trap this ti-"

Suddenly a machine whipped out of the wall, causing the group to freeze. In a split second, the gun-like machine shot a laser causing Kirby 2 to disappear.

"…"

"AH!" Olimar shouted in panic. His Pikmin hid behind him.

Sonic blinked. "He jinxed it, so I'm calling that." He pointed to where Kirby 2 had once stood.

"Are you crazy?!" Olimar exclaimed, whipping around to face Sonic.

Sonic blinked, obviously puzzled. "…What?"

"Kirby just got shot by a gun and disappeared right before our eyes, and you're talking about bad luck!"

Sonic put his hand to his chin, looking up to think. "…Well, it's kind of related, actua—"

Olimar interrupted. "That's not the point! We have to find him! Who knows what could happen!"

"Alright, alright," Sonic spoke, putting his hands up defensively. "Let's do some critical thinking. Since Kirby Number Two was shot by that laser and disappeared, he probably got teleported somewhere."

Olimar considered this. _Kirby was shot and disappeared, so perhaps that thing is actually a teleporting device? But besides the problem, we need to save him. Wait…_

He faced Sonic. "…Are you suggesting we get shot by that machine, too?"

Sonic shrugged nonchalantly. "Wouldn't hurt to try."

"Do you remember what happened when we fell down that hole?!"

"Yeah," Sonic replied. "But that was Kirby 2's fault that you fell in so…" Sonic grinned. "…I guess I'll have to drag you with me, this time."

Olimar noticed the mischievous gleam in Sonic's eyes as he was pulled in front of the machine.

The two positioned themselves in front of the gun-like machine.

"Actually, I might want to rethink this-" Olimar began.

A light emitted from the machine as Sonic observed, "Too late."

*The area was enveloped in an array of colors.

_**((((((Somewhere Unknown…))))))**_

The color soon faded into an incomprehensible form. Olimar blinked twice as his eyes focused on the area he had appeared.

Another metal room.

Beside him, a groan from Sonic was heard.

"Another room!" spoke Sonic. "Seriously?!"

Olimar sighed. "I have a feeling we're going to find another hallway, as well…"

"Huh? How did you guys get here?"

Both Olimar and Sonic turned to face three familiar faces.

_**((((((With Ike's Group…))))))**_

"_Oh, we'll be comin' around the hallway when we come,"_ Ike sang as he and Kirby walked.

"_We'll be comin' around the hallway when we come. We'll be comin' around the hallway to leave since it's been a long day, oh we'll be comin' around the hallway when we come!"_

"Po-yo!" Kirby exclaimed, hopping up.

The group continued.

"Wow, I wonder how long this tunnel is," Ike mused aloud.

Kirby looked around. "Poy…"

Ike shrugged as they continued. "Oh well. I hope there's turkey bacon in here."

Kirby smiled at the thought. "Poyo!"

"Yeah…You know what'd be better?" Ike asked Kirby.

"Mm?"

"_Two_ pieces of turkey bacon, no, _three,_ no, no, _over nine thousand_ pieces of turkey bacon!" Ike exclaimed. He could imagine a whole world made of delicious turkey bacon. So magical, so delicious.

Kirby then stopped, causing Ike to stop and look down at him. "Hm? What is it?"

"Poyo," Kirby spoke, pointing to a door in front of them. Apparently the tunnel had ended.

"…Oh," came Ike's response.

"…"

"…"

Ike shrugged before walking over to the door. "Well, I guess we ought to open it," he decided, taking hold of the knob. Ike began to turn but his wrist quickly froze. Ike frowned, trying to turn the knob.

It didn't budge any farther.

"Aw man!" Ike shouted, jiggling the doorknob madly. He then yanked on it with no avail. "Come on! Why is it locked?"

Kirby blinked, watching Ike continue to shake around the doorknob.

"Oh, whatever!" Ike finally exclaimed. He held his Ragnell back like a baseball bat. "Time for the big guns."

Ike swung the Ragnell straight into the door, causing a relatively massive explosion, enveloping him and the door in steam.

Once again, Kirby blinked, still watching as he was curious where the steam came from.

Ike waved away the steam and noticed a deep and long diagonal cut in the door. He grinned. "Now all we have to do is knock it—"

The top half of the door fell off.

Seeing this, Ike began again. "…Now all we have to do is jump over—"

The bottom half then disintegrated.

Ike blinked. He and Kirby exchanged glances.

Ike looked back at the door. "…Now all we have to do is walk inside," he finished.

The two then walked inside.

…

…

…

"Wait a second," Ike interrupted before turning to Kirby, looking perplexed.

Kirby paused and looked up at him. "Poyo?"

"Where's English Kirby?"

_**Author's Notes: **_**Didn't notice until right then, huh Ike? Ah, well. xD**

**As usual, questions!**

**If you were in the situation where you had to choose between taking Creepy Samus with you or try to lock her up, what would you do?**

**Why do you think Kirby 2 followed Sonic and Olimar rather than staying with Ike?**

**Do you think Kirby 1 and Ike will make a good team?**

**Who do you think those mysterious three familiar faces are?**

**Do you think Ike will every find turkey bacon?**

**WILL Ike ever find turkey bacon? Find out next time on…Olimar's Experiences on Guard Duty! :D**


	7. The Rude and the Random

_**Author's Notes**_**: I am just THE BEST at keeping schedules, aren't I? (-sarcasm right there)**

**Ah, whatever. In a sense, I'm improving…slightly. But improvement is improvement. Now, without further ado before I waste your time with my rambling, Chapter 7!**

Olimar's Experience on Guard Duty

Chapter 7

_**((Recap: Last time on "Olimar's Experiences on Guard Duty":  
The group wonders which hallway to go into until their interrupted by poor Ike's screaming!  
So after locking up Creepy Samus and getting Ike back they split into two groups and go into the hallways.  
Suddenly Olimar's Group realizes that Kirby 2 accidently (?) went with them! Olimar is alarmed, but either way they continue on.  
Just when things seem rather boring, Kirby 2 is shot and disappears!  
Sonic and Olimar then are teleported into another room while Ike and Kirby find a door! What will our heroes do now?))**_

"How did you guys get here?!" Sonic exclaimed, his eyes wide in surprise.

Olimar felt just as puzzled. "Is this where you've been?" Olimar questioned, raising an eyebrow.

"You mean standing in a nearly abandoned room for three days?" questioned Mewtwo. "Of course not."

"I did!" Young Link exclaimed, jumping up with his hand in the air. "I'm the best Hide-and-Seek player ever!"

Sonic and Olimar exchanged glances.

Roy's eyebrows furrowed in puzzlement. He looked down at Young Link. "Wait, we were playing Hide-and-Seek? Pichu and I were playing Mahjong," Roy responded.

Young Link blinked once before pouting at Roy.

"Roy," spoke Mewtwo, turning to Roy, "Mahjong is supposed to be a three or originally four player game. Besides that, I'm aware both you and Pichu know absolutely nothing about the game itself."

"You…guys played Mahjong?" Olimar asked.

Roy shrugged. "We tried."

Mewtwo rolled his eyes. "Oh, please. You and Pichu sat in front of the table for hours staring at the game."

"We were both mentally trying to figure it out," Roy insisted.

"I'm actually pretty sure Pichu was thinking along the lines of unicorns and flowery meadows."

"…I was trying to figure it out," Roy corrected himself. "You never know what Pichu's thinking…"

"Actually," began Olimar, "Mewtwo can read minds, so I think he would know what Pichu's thinking."

"Oh, right."

Silence began to settle in. That is, until Sonic spoke up.

"Speaking of Pichu," he began, "where is she?"

"That's why we're in here," Mewtwo answered. "We were looking for her when Roy said she was missing."

"_I_ said he was missing!" asserted Young Link. Yet for some reason no one acknowledged that.

"Okay," responded Sonic, ignoring Young Link's outburst. "But how did you guys find this place?"

Roy laughed. "Ha! Funny story," he said. "You see, Bowser got Ganondorf to try to get ROB to d—"

"Where's Dr. Mario?" questioned none other than Kirby 2, walking up to the group.

"We…don't know," Mewtwo responded.

Roy shrugged. "Nothing to be alarmed about. It's not like he's always with us. Dr. Mario is probably doing the things that doctors do."

Sonic raised an eyebrow. "Like?"

"I don't know. I'm not a doctor."

Suddenly an explosion behind them all was heard. Olimar and the others whipped around to see smoke coming out of a conveniently placed metallic door.

As the smoke cleared a figure formed.

It was Creepy Samus. And goodness knows why she was holding an axe.

Much to Olimar's surprise, Creepy Samus laughed manically.

"AHAHAHA!" she laughed manically. "IKE, I _FINALLY_—!"

Creepy Samus paused and blinked, staring at the group that was giving her bewildered looks.

"…Whoops. Wrong room."

"Where did you get that axe?!" Sonic shouted.

"And how did you get out of the door?!" Olimar exclaimed in disbelief.

Creepy Samus giggled. "Oh, funny story. You see, there was this one octopus who asked this sailor to eat some fried u—"

"WOW! That's great!" Kirby 2 interrupted sarcastically. "I TOTALLY would like to HEAR THAT, but NO."

Creepy Samus slouched with a pout before turning around and trudging away.

Young Link gazed at Kirby 2. "…You're really picking up some bad habits."

"You can be positive he wasn't like this in Ike's dream," Mewtwo stated.

"How do you know that?" Kirby 2 demanded.

"I can read your mind."

Kirby 2 appeared to be stunned.

"…Yeah, that was kind of already mentioned," Olimar reminded Kirby 2.

"Really?" Kirby 2 responded. "Oh, I don't think I was listening."

Olimar sighed, shaking his head. "Anyway…"

"Why are you guys here?" Roy inquired.

Kirby 2 laughed. "Heh! Funny story. You see, Ike's idea was stolen so we randomly followed him into a hallway but then suddenly h—"

"OBJECTION!"

All eyes turned to Roy.

"…What?" Olimar questioned, genuinely confused.

"You weren't there!" proclaimed Kirby 2.

"I know!" Roy laughed. "I just wanted to throw karma at you," he stated, pointing to Kirby 2, "for interrupting Creepy Samus and since I was interrupted."

Kirby 2 paused for a moment before making an attempt to cross his stubby arms and pout.

At this reaction, Roy raised an eyebrow. "Now why does that look seem so familiar..?"

"Roy!" an irritated Young Link exclaimed, jerking up. However, Roy pretended not to notice.

"Hmmm…"

"_Roy_!"

Roy still gazed at the wall in pretend thought. "Hmmm…"

"**Spaghetti!**"

All eyes flicked to Young Link, who looked to the side as the others followed his gaze all the way to the metallic door.

Beside it had appeared another door with Mario standing in front of it.

"…**Spaghetti!**" Mario randomly shouted again, thus proving Young Link's innocence.

Nobody spoke.

"…"

The group exchanged glances.

"Well…" Olimar blinked, rather surprised at the scene. "That was unexpected."

_**((((((With Ike's Group…))))))**_

"Aw man!" Ike exclaimed, jumping through the doors entrance with Kirby right behind him.

Ike turned to Kirby. "I can't believe English Kirby ditched us!" he continued before once again turning to face the inside of the room.

"Poy," Kirby responded, gazing around.

For some reason, it appeared that all the rooms they stumbled upon were metallic. (*)

Kirby stared up at Ike. "Poyo, poy poyo?"

Ike stared back down at Kirby. "…" He blinked. "…I have no clue what you just said."

Kirby gave a slight pout in response.

"Anyway," Ike began, turning around yet again. He stopped and glanced around at the empty, metallic room. "…Now what?"

Ike walked to the middle of the room. "What are we supposed to do here?!" Ike questioned, raising his arms for emphasis. "I mean, I sure don't see any point. Did we reach a dead end..?"

As Ike continued his rambling, Kirby hopped around to survey the area.

Honestly, it wasn't much. Visible seams where the metallic pieces fit together to create the room, along with the now-disintegrated door and its doorway, there didn't seem to be much else.

Kirby sighed and glanced behind to see Ike walking around, still rambling.

"…which reminds me of the time I saw Bob the Mailman at the grocery store," Ike was currently recounting as he aimlessly walked about the room. "Funny story. He had some mail for Sonic and asked me to deliver it. But then what ended up happening was that collie that Luigi found ate it and s—"

"I like trains."

Ike stopped and turned to Kirby, who then looked past Ike. Ike turned around, surprised to see Bowser standing in the middle of the room.

"…"

Ike blinked.

Bowser blinked.

Kirby did not blink.

Ike and Kirby exchanged glances. Ike faced Bowser with his eyebrows furrowed in bafflement. "How did you get here?"

Bowser raised an index claw and opened his mouth to answer but just then he was run over by a speeding train.

Ike's eyes widened as the running train finally came to an end.

"…Poy?" Kirby voiced in confusion, seeing that the whole room was still intact.

Ike squinting his eyes and rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "This must be the 'Nothing but Randomness' room…"

"Yo?" Kirby squeaked.

"…I still have no idea what you said."

Kirby sighed.

_**((((((Back with Olimar's Group…))))))**_

"Guys!" shouted a voice, causing everybody in the room to look up.

"**Spaghetti!**" Mario shouted back in response.

Unexpectedly, Pit slid onto the floor in the middle of the group before scrambling to his feet.

"Pit?" Olimar raised an eyebrow quizzically. "How did you get here?"

Pit laughed. "Ha! Funny story! You see, I was looking for Zelda when Sheik came and told me stuff about how Bowser read fanfiction and went to Wario, who was watching M—"

"**Spaghetti!**"

Pit stopped and stared at Mario. "…Huh?"

"Ignoring that just happened," Mewtwo muttered.

"Wow," Sonic remarked, "there are way too many swordsmen around here."

"Hey!" Roy and Young Link exclaimed in unison.

_**((((((With Ike's Group…))))))**_

"Hey!" Ike exclaimed, causing Kirby to throw him a puzzled look.

_**((((((Back with Olimar's Group…))))))**_

"Hey—! Wait," Pit paused to think. "…Am I considered a swordsman?"

Roy shrugged. "You handle your bow kind of like dual swords."

Pit considered that fact. "Good point."

Olimar turned to Sonic. "What makes you say that?"

"Well, I mean," Sonic began to list, "we're with Ike, you've seen Pit twice, now, and Roy is here."

Young Link scowled at the lack of acknowledgement. "Hey!"

Sonic paid no heed, which had Olimar puzzled at why everyone seemed to be ignoring Young Link.

"…That is true," Olimar said slowly. "And Young Link is also here," he added.

"Thank you!" Young Link spoke gratefully.

Olimar nodded his way. "You're welcome and…wait, Sonic, how did you know I saw Pit twice counting now?"

Pit's expression twisted into a confused one before he turned to Sonic. "Yeah, how do you know that if you weren't there the first time?"

"Actually, I was there."

"You were?" Olimar and Pit questioned in unison.

"Yep." Sonic chuckled at the memory. "Funny story—Okay, so I ran into Lucas during a game of Hide-and-Seek when out of nowhere there was this tall sp—"

"I suddenly remembered something!" Pit shouted.

All eyes were on him.

"…What?" Olimar finally asked.

Pit inhaled and opened his mouth to speak.

"…"

After a moment he exhaled with a disappointed expression. "Oh, darn, I forgot…"

The group groaned.

"…I wonder how Ike and other me are doing," Kirby 2 wondered aloud.

_**((((((With Ike's Group…))))))**_

"And that is why I drive a Mercedes-Benz," a British-accented Donkey Kong wearing a black suit, top hat, and a monocle finished.

Sitting at the table covered in a tea party set, Ike and Kirby exchanged uncomfortable glances before both slowly started clapping.

"…Interesting," Ike commented slowly, feeling awkward.

The British Donkey Kong took a sip of his tea. "Quite."

_**((((((Back with Olimar's Group…))))))**_

"**Spaghetti!**"

Sonic's eyelids lowered. "Okay, we really need to get rid of this guy."

"Pit," Mewtwo addressed. "You never told us why you were here in the first place."

"Huh? Oh yeah!" Pit remembered. "I came here to warn you guys about how Wario and Bowser went around stuffing bombs down all of the Smash Mansion's toilets!"

An awkward silence settled.

Mewtwo finally spoke. "…And you know this how?"

"Palutena told me."

"Ah…"

Sonic blinked. "Okay…Thanks for warning us, I guess," he responded uncertainly.

"That's…enlightening, Pit," Olimar agreed, "but not too helpful for the situation at hand."

"Good thing I don't live here!" Kirby 2 piped up.

"You are the worst Kirby rendition of Kirby ever!" Young Link fumed.

Kirby 2 was taken aback. "W-what? I am not!"

"You're not even from Ike's dream! If that Kirby 's any nicer, I'd rather meet him than you!"

"I am not the only person who ignores you!"

Pit glanced at Kirby 2 and Young Link. "Um…"

"Hey," Olimar cut in. "Fighting won't solve an—"

"STAY OUT OF THIS!" the two kids shouted in unison, causing Olimar to shrink back.

Roy blinked at the reaction. "Well…this escalated quickly."

"Agreed," Olimar squeaked, watching Kirby 2 and Young Link bicker.

Mewtwo sighed, shaking his head. "This is getting ridiculous…"

"Oh great," Sonic groaned.

"Um…" Pit glanced at the two arguing children once more. "Uhhh…Hey, look!" he suddenly called out, pointing in a random direction. "Something to distract you guys from fighting!"

Instinctively everybody looked over to the area Pit pointed towards just to see another Kirby.

A puzzled silence settled in. (**)

"…**Spaghetti!**" Mario shouted as if to remind everyone of his existence.

"…Hey there," the newcomer Kirby greeted with a small wave.

"…Again," Sonic stated.

"What?" Olimar asked, facing Sonic.

Sonic stared at the new Kirby. "Again with another Kirby…"

…

…

…

"How do you know all this stuff?!" Pit demanded.

_**((((((To Be Continued… [x3]))))))**_

_**Author's Notes: **_**Times three because I forgot to do that the past two chapters.**

**(*) Because this author's imagination of rooms is repetitive.**

**(**) Because there are just so many awkward moments.**

**Honestly, I can't believe only two chapters and then I went away from the story's original reason to exist. But, a plot is a plot and afterwards we will see more of that jigsaw puzzle style. :D**

**Also, some other things I'd like to state is: Young Link being the best Hide-and-Seek player ever. Give credit to DatLittleStar, because her hilarious story "Spread the Love" is where I got it from!**

**Also, the thing about Bowser and Wario stuffing bombs down toilets was sort of a random thing based off of something in an SSB roleplay I did that happened. xD**

**Now: Questions!**

**Did you spot any references? (There are only a few.)**

**Roy, Creepy Samus, Kirby 2, Ike, and Pit all were interrupted in the middle of their "funny story". If they each would've continued, who do you think might've had the funniest story?**

**Have you ever had a group of characters and forgot to mention one of them for a long period of time?**

**What do you think happened to Pichu and Dr. Mario?**

**What was your favorite random moment out of this chapter?**

**Also, Kirby 2 straying from his original "Ike's Crazy Dream" personality was unintentional. I made him so mean! :(**

**Ah, well. Thanks for Reading and please Review! See you all next chapter!**


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